“Femme Voices” Spotlight: Ya Gay Aunties Podcast

Ya Gay Aunties is a podcast hosted by Hanifah and Red, two friends who have taken it upon themselves to guide baby queer POCs in the right direction one episode at a time. They discuss topics such as relationships, pop culture, and politics and they also have special guest interviews. Their episodes are always thoughtful and sometimes controversial but at the end of the day, what’s important to them is reaching people by providing a different voice. This contribution to the community is priceless because many of us don’t have access to getting advice from those like us who have been in our shoes before.

Check out the interview below to learn about how Hanifah and Red began Ya Gay Aunties and how they deal with daily life as well as manage and curate such an important podcast.

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“Femme Voices” Spotlight: Island Couple, Shannon and Shanika

Shannon and Shanika, our next “Femme Voices” spotlight, are a femme couple living and loving in their native island, Jamaica. Shannon, a nursing student, and Shanika, a musician, are best friends and consider themselves to be twin flames after being reconnected via one fateful Instagram DM. They talk to us about their dreams and aspirations as individuals and as a couple. Their view on relationships and their energy-focused self-care methods allow them to have the capacity to love one another effortlessly, in the midst of an environment that isn’t exactly receptive to who they are. Shannon and Shanika share the things they are passionate about and their inspiring love story below!

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“Femme Voices” Feature: Creative Entrepreneur, Latiana of “Office Hrs”

Credit: Yekaterina Gyadu

Our next “Femme Voices” Feature, Latiana, knows a thing or two about being flexible enough to embrace where life takes you. A lover of community, she establishes projects that focus on getting folks together through the creative process and shared experiences. Latiana’s latest endeavor is Office Hrs, an event planning company and management crew. No matter where her entrepreneurial spirit takes her, Latiana makes sure that she is doing what she loves and what makes her feel whole and free.

Read on to find out more about Latiana!

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“Femme Voices” Artist Spotlight: Photographer, Zoha Van de aarde

Zoha Van de aarde is this week’s “Femme Voices” feature interview. They are a photographer whose art is both provocative and beautiful. Zoha primarily photographs women of color, as they believe they deserve more representation, especially in a light that showcases who they are and not how the outside world perceives them to be. A creative at heart, Zoha constructs their shoots from concept to completion and enjoys collaborating with their subjects on different themes. In this way, they endeavor to inspire those who view their art and those involved in helping create it.

Read more about this gifted photographer below the break!

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“Femme Voices” Writer Spotlight: “Finding Community Far from Home,” by Trae Higgs

I moved to the Big Apple in August 2014, in a long-term relationship and knowing everything about everything. I had graduated from my university just four months prior and I was ready for new experiences far away from the only place I had ever lived, Florida. For much of my life, I had no issues with Florida. I had beaches at my disposal and warm weather 98.5% of the year. Hell, I’m from the place that rappers and singers mention in songs and where every professional athlete vacations: Miami. What’s not to love?

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“Femme Voices” Couple Spotlight: Interview with Creatives, Joy & Brandy

Wedding Day, 2014

Just in time for Valentine’s Day, Joy and Brandy are our very first couple spotlight for “Femme Voices”! Their couple’s page, @lovejandb, caught my eye because of how they seamlessly come together as a unit, while also representing their own branding for each of their careers. After interviewing them, I was delighted to find out that this was no different than how they function in their relationship. They are able to nurture their partnership and work on furthering their careers as they flourish in their unique identities. In our interview, Brandy and Joy share what makes their creative minds tick and how they keep the love alive in their marriage.

Read on for more of this beautiful couple!

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Finding a Balance: Tips & Tricks for the Side-Hustler

Being a side-hustler is more than just a job (or two), it’s a lifestyle. But just as with any other lifestyle, although you are driven by a desire to live it, it takes time to perfect. Since I have been working on my own side-hustle for a couple of years now, I wanted to share some of my tips:

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“Chill out, it was Just a Joke.” – Is America Getting too Sensitive?

 

I get so annoyed when people complain that America is “getting too sensitive”. What does that even mean? Is it wrong to respect humanity so much that we get upset if anyone commits mental and emotional violence on others with their words and actions? Is it wrong to be concerned that negative ideologies, beliefs, and stereotypes are being reinforced by the media or people who simply like to hear themselves talk?

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy fun and “ratchet” music and TV or a (thoughtful) satire or a sarcastic joke as much as the next person but sometimes humor and entertainment value are used as excuses to continue to cast a blind eye on how marginalized groups are treated and viewed in this country. Sadly, the unwillingness to learn about others takes precedence over understanding others’ experiences in order to simply treat people better. And it doesn’t stop at entertainment and social media. There are many offensive things that take place in our everyday lives that have been so accepted that it is hard to convince people of their harmful nature. Things like work and school micro-aggressions, exclusionary practices, and cultural and ethnic erasure and homogenization are just a few ways we have ingrained ignorance into our existence.

 

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#MillennialGirlMagic

As far as I’m concerned, people in my generation are the only true millennials. I mean, I graduated from high school in the year 2000, the beginning of the new millennium (by popular opinion, if not the actual beginning). They said that those in my class represented the future. It was an honor, yes, but it also came with very high expectations. Apparently, now there are two decades of people, most of whom are younger than us, who have been dubbed millennials and for whatever their reasons, older generations look down on millennials as a whole today. I guess things have changed.

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Social Media (& Black Twitter) – The Gift & The Curse

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As a new blogger (I know I’m super late to the game) I have been realizing that I have to step up my social media skills. Not to say that I don’t usually do social media, because I do. I just miss the days of Facebook, for example, where not everyone and their mom could sign up and it wasn’t such a free for all. Mind you, I’m not one to be elitist about things, especially not something like Facebook but I enjoyed it a lot more when friends were actually friends.

Nowadays, even if you do actually know your Facebook friends in real life, some of these “so called” friends might not be so friendly. We all know of people who use Facebook as a platform to spew their ignorant, often hateful or just plain old judgmental speech. It gets so bad that we end up having to un-friend these people. As a writer, I’m all about free speech but it’s come to a point where I dread having to log on to Facebook, a network that I used to use to keep in touch with friends and family and share with them the current statuses of my life. If I wanted to hear ignorant, hateful speech, I would turn on Fox News and if I wanted to argue with people, I would join a debate Meetup, or better yet, call one of my exes. I wish I could permanently log off of Facebook but alas, it is connected to pretty much every app I use and as intrusive as this may be, it’s pretty damn convenient for log in purposes.

And then there’s these new-ish social media platforms like Snap Chat. Don’t get me started on that one. It looks so fun when other people use it, but for the life of me I can’t figure it out. I’m more of an Instagram person. As much as I love words, there’s nothing like a simple yet beautiful or funny picture and a cute caption to go with it – not that I am in any way an expert on captions. I’m more of a “Happy Friday!” captioner.

Anyway, the one social network that I still don’t entirely get but am determined to add to my very small social network repertoire is Twitter. It can be a great way to spread the word about everything from a blog, a movie, or even breaking news. So I was all for it, ready to start tweeting, sharing links and pics, re-tweeting and mentioning. But after following a few of my favorite personalities, bloggers and podcasters, and seeing the hell they get from not only trolls but *gasp* Black Twitter, I began feeling a little intimidated.

Trolls are awful and can’t be helped, I suppose, but Black Twitter is actually something that I used to imagine that I could be a part of, until recently. I will say Black Twitter is very in tune with what is going on in the Twitter-verse (or is it Twitter-sphere?) but they are also always ready to pounce, sometimes without the proper information. It doesn’t help that there probably is no vetting process to becoming a member. I’m pretty sure you just have to identify as Black, have an active Twitter account, and use whatever clever hashtag all the other members are using. I’ve never been one to back down from a good argument but like I said above about Facebook, who wants to be involved in unnecessary Twitter beefs? I just want to promote my blog and put my words out into the universe, not be a part of any drama.

But, at the end of the day, I have decided to forge ahead with my entry on to Twitter because I have to admit that Black Twitter does attack those who definitely need to be attacked, not just the undeserving, and Black Twitter is funny as hell and consistently provides me with laughs.

Here are some examples of Black Twitter moments and hashtags that I’ve enjoyed and also some not so great Black Twitter attacks:

1. I love when Black Twitter gets political: The hashtag #WhichHillary (#WhichHillary Trends on Twitter after BLM activist interrupts Clinton fundraiser) Note: this hashtag was used by many on Twitter not just Black Twitter, but it was started by a Black Lives Matter activist and member of Black Twitter

2. And when it fights for Black feminism and social justice:

3. I especially love when Black Twitter is just plain old hilarious:

4. But we can’t forget when Black Twitter is simultaneously thoughtful while making jokes, a skill in and of itself:

5. Unfortunately, a thoughtful and funny response can sometimes go wrong: The hashtag #RealBlackPeopleQuestions hashtag was great (Black Twitter asks #RealBlackPeopleQuestions after this Buzzfeed Video fail) but then Black Twitter attacked Black Buzzfeed writers who had nothing to do with the video, Why Buzzfeed’s Latest Video “Questions Black People Have for Black People” is Out of Pocket, that was the motivation behind the hashtag.

6. And sometimes attacks can be divided and in some cases, both sides can be totally off base – even if only in the delivery of the message: Black women attacked Ayesha Curry and then, surprise surprise, Black men attacked Black women for not being more like Ayesha Curry after a Tweet she posted (Ayesha Curry Ruffled A Few Feathers On Twitter With Commentary On How Women Dress).

What I’ve learned about this social media world is just like with so many other things, I’m going to have to take the good with the bad, and most importantly, enjoy the laughs along the way. Oh yeah and I will have to avoid the dreaded #hoteptwitter and Hotep Facebook at all costs. Those who don’t know what that is, consider yourself lucky. Just know that if they dare come for me, I’ll be ready – maybe even with my own Femme-inist Black Twitter posse.